I realized the other day...

That I hate fighting. Specifically I hate fighting in groups. I don't like following someone else around, something in my brain clicks off, and I'm not exploring, I'm just following. I don't tend to learn anything, I think my feet have perfected the art of staying the appropriate distance behind the exile in front for the exile in back to be able to see me with *no* input from my brain, so it just takes off. So I don't really learn much about where I'm going, unless I really try. I usually don't feel I can just nip off in another direction to cement my own pathfinding which is necessary for me to confirm where I think I am and build connections on my mental map. "Oh, I think I recognize this faceless clump of trees... if I'm right there should be that giant outcrop on the next snell over."

The second big downer is that I don't like standing around some poor doomed monster and whacking at it until I hit it. Ick ick ick. Where's the fun and challenge in that? Sure, I might learn something, like the perfect blade angle to cut off one of it's fingers. How horrible.

Now, if there's some challenge involved it's usually different. Unless that challenge is just how to lure one more monster from the next snell to this one so that we might whittle away at it. Solo hunting somewhere I might die is exciting. Hunting with a group of exiles who weren't three levels above me might also be exciting I suppose. Somehow I always end up fighting with fifth and sixth circle fighters and a fourth circle healer or two. Which usually makes me completely ineffective for anything other than tagging. Which I've already established I hate. Why do I do this to myself? Because all my friends are higher circle than myself.

In related news, Peony is considering trying for a bard belt. She thinks being a cadding healer who can play music might be fun.